My arms get cold

in February air,
Please don't lose hold
of me out there;

Valentine's Day is coming up. I've decided not to make a big deal out of it, seeing as it's a day that comes every year and it's silly to go crazy over it. I'm just going to erase it from my calendar, like it doesn't even exist, and I'm going to treat it as February the fourteenth. That's just the most reasonable way I can think of going about it.

Everyone seems to expect me to like someone. I think they're all crazy. I'm not getting dragged back into that preteen shit again. I know how that works. You start looking at them more. Talk to them and giggle at their jokes. Then suddenly you've got their number and they're your 346th Facebook friend, and they're asking you to hang out with them and their friends at the mall. A week later you go to the movies, the next day they ask you out, and a month and half later you split 'cos one of you likes someone else. It. Is. A. Never. Ending. Cycle. I don't want that. It's boring.

And another thing, I'm greatly opposed to dating someone I go to school with. It'd be cute at first, what with waiting outside classes, or pulling a and sneaking kisses in the hallway, but no. Just no. I don't want to see them everyday. Especially because in the morning I'm really pissy, and I tend to carry a lot of books with me through the halls and that looks ridiculous, and there are just way too many awkward moments at school.

I've decided that the phrase "pulling an Austin" has been tired out. The new term is simply "austin." Example: He is SUCH an austin. Verb form? "Aussing." (He's totally aussing me.) I have to use that now in daily conversation. "Dude, seventh graders are such douchebags. I tried to be friends with one but she way aussed me."

And, uh, I only have three months left in middle school. This month I have to apply for a high school. I'm not sure that I'm ready for high school. I'd like to fast-forward over summer though. I don't want to deal with summer. It feels like it shouldn't be my problem.

Maybe I can make a fresh start next year. I can't say that I really want to. This year I actually.. fit in. And now that I've finally found a way to step out of the shadows without losing myself, well, I don't want to ruin that. But I already know it can't last all that well next year. Too many people. It's like a watered-down Coke.

I think that about wraps it up.